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By. Allen Chavez
There’s this really weird religion/movement that has taken the world by storm called pastafariansm and now you may be wondering “What the heck is pastafarianism?” Pastafarianism is a religion/movement that promotes the existence of a flying spaghetti monster. It is currently one of the world’s fastest growing carbohydrate-based religions!
This religion/movement has existed in secrecy for hundreds of years, but achieved mainstream recognition just a few years ago. The Flying Spaghetti Monster (FSM for short) is thought to have created everything in existence, personally maintain gravitational forces throughout the universe, and is generally regarded as a kind and benevolent creator. As we already know many or all religions have prayers, well, the pastafarians have a prayer as well: “Our pasta, who art in a colander, draining be your noodles. Thy noodle come, Thy sauce be yum, on top some grated Parmesan. Give us this day, our garlic bread, …and forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trample on our lawns. And lead us not into vegetarianism, but deliver us some pizza, for thine is the meatball, the noodle, and the sauce, forever and ever. R’amen.”
If anyone is considering becoming a Pastafarian minister and getting a Certificate of Ordination from the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, go to their website www.venganza.org, and have a credit card ready to cover the $25.00 fee.